So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I am mentally ready for anal.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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