Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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