Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
