How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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