there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
