she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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