Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
