I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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