Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
