Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I stole a fireplace last night.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize