i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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