we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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