Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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