tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
its not stalking. its research.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Randomize
