Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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