I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
