My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
