I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I love how my cats smell like pot.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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