is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
