Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
