id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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