i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
