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Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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