is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
That accounts for only three of the penises
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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