Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
