he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
3 2 1 whiskey
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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