You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
