After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
