They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
