i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
