I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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