why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Randomize
