But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
