Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Randomize
