Pappa wants mamma naked
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
