it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
