hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
