can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
