Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
i think i just lost a toe
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
