I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
