He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Randomize
