You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I have post one night stand depression
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize