jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
