when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
