Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
