do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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