No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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