its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Randomize
