I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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