3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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